•MW•
Dogs. They’re great. I have two. They are quite literally my world. Nothing and nobody will ever come between my dogs and I. Including men. I sound crazy, I understand. Have you ever thought about how difficult it is to date when you own a dog? Never mind two. First off, you have to find what seems like a very small amount of dudes left that aren’t allergic to dogs. Then they actually have to like dogs. Yes I know, who doesn’t like dogs?! I’ve quite literally had a guy awkwardly sit there while my dogs attack him with kisses and their cute little annoying approach to new people. Most people think dating with a dog would be easy. You walk the dog, you pick up that cute guy at the park, you talk about dogs and then you walk away hand in hand and hand in leash. The end. Well friends, I’m here to tell you they are “barking”*** up the wrong tree. That guy you met at the park?! Doesn’t realize you have to pick up poop multiple times on the way home, or that you need to be home every few hours to let the dogs out. You can’t sleep at his place because you have a dependant at home waiting for you. Never mind when the dog picks up that dead bird it found on the street and you’re chasing your dog like a mad women to make sure they don’t swallow it. No? That hasn’t happened to anyone else?! Bummer. I could imagine this would be much like a child however a child needs a lot more attention (or so I’m told that’s how it goes) speaking as a mother of two fur babies I can say that dating while owning two dogs and no real “dog supporter” to “lend” them to for a night is tough. Finding that fur baby step dad whom understands how much work a dog (x2) really is. The girls are a lot of work but I wouldn’t have it any other way. For now, I firmly believe my “dating” if we even want to call it that; is in the past. Right now it is just me and my two girls. A whole lotta fur & cookies. I couldn’t be happier.
– Scoopin’ poop Crooks
**** this joke gets lamer every time I go to edit this post. However, dad jokes rule.
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